DJ Hero has a dedicated Flavor Flav button. Well, no; it’s technically a “sample” button that triggers a set of predetermined samples when playing a mix. But unfortunately, the default sample set is the first of two sets of Flavor Flav clips, including the infamous “Yeahhhhh boyyyyyyyeeeee!”

Experts agree that Flavor Flav can present a number of daunting questions that are difficult for a young child’s mind to process. We’re pleased to announce our upcoming parent’s guide to teaching your child the truth about Flavor Flav — and why he isn’t so scary after all.

Unfortunately, we still haven’t figured out how to just make him go away.

Aaron's confronting some tough questions about himself this week. He asked me to make this image link to a, uh, helpful YouTube video. Enjoy.

Aaron:

“Get money, get paid.” It’s a classic pursuit-of-happiness phrase, a self-evident truth we should all adhere to. Without money, we aren’t getting paid, no? And what does one do when this “paid” status is finally reached? I don’t know about you, but in that position I’d feel accomplished and willing to purchase exorbitant varieties of goods. Maybe, once I was “paid,” I could afford to buy contraptions such as a gold-plated PlayStation 3. However, I’m currently not getting money, and as a result I’m not getting paid. So I must use the little resources I have to intelligently scour for deals on games I’m interested in.

The point is, you should see my Google calendar. For the past few months I’ve persistently added upcoming game deals to my calendar, and other things like free Xbox 360 themes and avatar rewards. Websites like Cheap Ass Gamer are excellent tools to help you save cash. Digital distribution services on the PC have shown me throughout 2009 that you should never pay full price for any game, big or small. There have been simply too many noteworthy deals from Steam, Direct 2 Drive and Impulse to list in this backlog.

So, I’ve been playing my old games lately, getting as much mileage out of them as possible while I wait for other titles to drop their price; Modern Warfare 2, Rock Band 2 and Left 4 Dead 2 were my sources of entertainment this past week. All those number twos are starting to look like a math problem by the way: (MW²) x (RB²) x (L4D²) = Enjoyment/Time. Clearly I know nothing about math anymore, but I’m basically implying that the more I play these games — two-thirds of which are still very new — the more I feel I’m getting my money’s worth. And as far as Left 4 Dead 2, Nick and I joined up with two other people for the four pack Steam discount, bringing the grand total of each PC copy to $33.75. Like I said, don’t pay full price for anything, if possible. Oh, and I got Modern Warfare 2 as a gift. So, that doesn’t really count.

The rest of December is looking fantastic for cheap gaming. Christmas gifts are an obvious focus, but soon Direct2Drive’s “24 Days of Christmas” sale (where a new game is on sale for 24 hours each day, and it’s generally 50% off its normal price) will be featuring Torchlight and Machinarium, each for $10. Having played the demos for both, I’m extremely tempted to just pay full price right now so I can satiate my crazed hunger. But, without getting “paid,” I’ll hold out for the $10-per-title sale on D2D. Also, Xbox LIVE Arcade will be briefly dropping the price of Shadow Complex (a game we expertly discussed on a past podcast, if I may be so bold) for a week, from $15 to $10 starting December 21st (or from 1200 to 800). I’ll finally snatch that up too.

In an optimal situation, I wouldn’t hesitate to pay talented developers every penny they deserve, but I’m not in an optimal situation. They’re still getting my money in the end. And that’s better than resorting to pirating, right?

Doug shot a video on his iPhone 3G S of me playing "Groundhog" by Noisia on expert, arguably the toughest song in the game. Not pictured: Me doing pretty terrible after the first thirty seconds.

Doug:

So now that the strange trailing finals week is complete, it’s time to play some damn games.

I paid co-managing editor Nick a visit earlier this week and got to give DJ Hero a try. And I now believe the hype that Nick has been giving it the last few weeks. It’s so easy to dismiss the game — especially given Activision’s recent track record with music games — but it’s actually, from my brief impression, very well thought-out and put together. The aesthetic is interesting and makes sense with the music on tap; the licensed characters spinning records for you look great (especially Daft Punk); and, most importantly, it’s a very fun game to play. Giving the fake wheel of steel a spin on medium, I felt active but not totally overwhelmed at first — there’s a lot going on in the game, but it feels manageable. It scratches the multi-tasking, switch on the fly itch that many other great games get right as well.

DJ Hero feels like the sort of evolution of the Konami Beatmania games that the original Guitar Hero was of Guitar Freaks. Besides lending a more Western touch to the soundtrack (Anglo-American rock for GH, American hip-hop and electronic music for DJH), both games also evolve the core gameplay mechanic while retaining the basic concept — and the difficulty. Watching Nick take a stab at one of the hardest sets in the game on Hard drove in not just how deep the gameplay here can be, but also how fun it is to watch somebody proficient at a music game.

I also FINALLY started up Batman: Arkham Asylum, borrowed from Nick as well given my free time. God is it good; the only real complaint I have is that you can definitely tell it’s an Unreal Engine game — it’s got that ugly plastic doll look to the characters, especially when the camera pulls up close during cinematics. The gameplay…man, I can’t say enough good about it. The controls fall right to hand simply and easily, everything works like it should, and the puzzles and set-pieces the storyline guide you through are interesting and very fun to play. Looking forward to continuing on with the game and seeing what waits later on. What an experience.

Also got more time into NCAA 10, Forza Motorsport 3, and Brütal Legend, the latter of which I’m re-warming up to despite its (numerous) gameplay flaws. Forza 3 saw a DLC pack drop this week, and I feel like a total consumer whore for giving in to temptation….but it’s so good. 11 more cars for the game, including a few more super-advanced racing cars…mmmm. Awesome.

Apparently it's okay to feature a violently racist character in a game so long as she never refers to her scapegoat by the real-world name.

Nick:

I bet you thought I was gonna talk about DJ Hero! Yeah, it’s a blast, and I’m getting close to five-starring every song on expert, but it wasn’t the biggest draw for me this week.

My PlayStation 3 and I haven’t always been on the best of terms. I succumbed to her siren song last summer when the temptation of a Metal Gear Solid 4 bundle and the short-lived ecstasy of being a college graduate motivated me to pick one up and see what this HDMI nonsense was all about. While it has since proved itself to be the absolute best DVD upscaler I’ve ever seen (really — it’s gorgeous), most of the console-exclusive games Sony fans have boasted about have all struck me as lackluster. LittleBigPlanet, though bursting with charm, wasn’t as tight to control or easy to navigate as it should have been; InFamous was a marvelous platformer with an unforgivably terrible story with characters even a mother couldn’t love; and Resistance 2 and Killzone 2 were both gorgeous and perfectly playable, but nowhere near as memorable for me as the Halo or Gears of War franchises.

Somehow, I forgot about Valkyria Chronicles, the much-lauded action-strategy gem that gamers either didn’t play or absolutely fell in love with. It’s even more embarrassing because I’ve owned a copy for almost a year now, but for whatever reason — maybe the stereotypical anime illustrations and voice actors — I never gave it more than an hour of my time. That changed this week when I sat down to give it another shot, and stood up after three hours and four chapters had passed in the game. I’m hooked, without a doubt.

What’s there to say? It’s brilliant. It’s the most creative and purely fun tactical strategy game I’ve played since Advance Wars was released eight years ago. The game flows along seamlessly, despite the relative mediocrity of many of the voice actors and the sometimes-uncomfortable combination of manga-style storytelling with a pseudo-realistic Europe in World War II. If I were to pick one exclusive game to convince somebody why a PlayStation 3 is worth owning — something unique and memorable — Valkyria Chronicles is the one. Sure, Uncharted 2 is an incredible adventure, and the whimsy and charm of Ratchet and Clank is unparalleled, but nothing else out there plays like Valkyria Chronicles. Games this creative and engaging are rare lately, so if it’s within your means to play it, I highly recommend doing so.

The Holidays approach. For some that means quality time with family members not seen for a year — maybe more. Others, well…can I get a “what what” if at some point during your life you hid away in the midst of celebrations to finish Earthbound (or, insert other game reference here). However, my adult years have made me more personable when it comes to the holidays; I’m now infinitely more interested in the going-ons of my kin.

Still, I won’t lie that this year I’d prefer to mow down more of Left 4 Dead 2′s cajunized zombies with a giant plate of delicious turkey and fixins on my lap. I’m thankful for me.

We’re back on track for backlogs, and this week is mega-sized to make up for our absence. To summarize: Nick informs us he essentially played everything ever released this month, Doug gushes about his beloved Forza 3 between study sessions, and I write about why two wonderful November-born titles should be played on the PC.

Do the Mario!

Nick:

Life served up a particularly hellish week for me, so it was fortunate that I had a slew of excellent games to escape with.

I spent a few fantastic hours in New Super Mario Bros. Wii in its fantastic cooperative/competitive mode earlier this week. What Jerry Holkins said about this game’s debilitating effects on a relationship is true, to a point; while we were able to help each other out for the most part, there were times where my attempts to “take the lead” or “get us through this tough spot” often led to one or both of us being killed, prompting my girlfriend to say some things about me that are rarely included in the same sentences used to talk about a Mario game. But it was all in good fun — something this game has in ample supply. It’s Mario in his best form ever, and anyone who grew up playing these games should purchase it without hesitation.

This week also brought another sequel to a game I adored: Assassin’s Creed 2. Transporting the game to Renaissance Italy is perhaps the most significant shift in story and setting that I’ve seen in a franchise in quite some time, and Ubisoft Montreal deserves some commendation for crafting an incredible sequel to an already ambitious debut title. There’s so much I could say about how things were improved — combat, economy, actions and consequences, exploration, story — but I’ll lay it out like this instead. If you loved Assassin’s Creed, you’ll love Assassin’s Creed 2. And if you hated the original? You’ll probably love Assassin’s Creed 2 anyway.

Having completed all five campaigns in Left 4 Dead 2, I’m happy to pronounce myself an official fan of the series. Although I bought the first game and had my fair share of fun with it, I always felt a little uneasy playing it. And it wasn’t because of the game’s tension, or horror-film veneer, or anything like that; it was just that the game sent a constant message that your survival was entirely at the game director’s mercy. In the sequel, the tone has changed significantly for the better. If Left 4 Dead was Valve’s attempt to make an interactive zombie movie like Dawn of the Dead, Left 4 Dead 2 is Valve making a balls-out Zombieland-style game. Melee weapons encourage close combat, lending a sense of strength and confidence to the survivors that was sorely missing from the first. All four of the characters in the sequel have stronger personalities than the first game’s survivors, and their determination on getting to New Orleans to be rescued encourages the player to keep slogging it out through hell and high water. It’s one of the most improved sequels of the year, without a doubt.

And when you consider that Left 4 Dead 2 was developed in just one year, it’s disappointing that Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 didn’t shape up to be more substantial. To be fair, Infinity Ward’s last game, Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare, not only reinvented the series — it raised the bar significantly for what an online multiplayer experience can be. I sank a “mere” 40 hours into COD4′s multiplayer mode, which pales in comparison to most of the people on my friends list. Multiplayer in Modern Warfare 2 is technically just as good as COD4′s, but after a solid six hours online in a variety of modes I’m struggling to stay interested. The mantra in developing this sequel seems to have been “more options in every aspect of play,” which is a good thing, but the core sensation of Call of Duty 4 has dulled for me. I was hoping lightning would strike twice, and I suppose it did, but I was hoping for a more risky and adventurous update to multiplayer — not a mere iteration. If I wanted that, I’d have bought last year’s Call of Duty: World at War. If there is one area that received a substantial improvement, though, it’s the single player. Rather than attempt to keep things within the bounds of reality, Infinity Ward opted to create an over-the-top global conflict that was flawlessly paced from start to finish. It’s ludicrous, but it’s so, so much fun. At about six hours to complete, it’s shorter than COD4′s — but considering how tedious replaying that game’s campaign was for me, I’m much happier with the new game’s approach.

I’m still slogging through Dragon Age: Origins with my city elf rogue. Steam says I’ve played for quite a long time, but I’m only at about 15% completion. Maybe it’s because I love reading every entry in the admirably written codex, or because I can’t help but talk to every NPC, but I’m getting an astronomically entertaining experience for my money with this game. I’m really struggling to fathom just how Mass Effect 2 could top the quality of this experience once it hits in January.

I also sank a few rounds in with the Battlefield: Bad Company 2 beta. I’d been hoping for a return to the glory days of Battlefield 2, and instead what I got was Bad Company with a moderate graphical upgrade; it’s good, but there are better options available. Looks like I’ll still be holding out for Battlefield 3 after all.

Doug sums up his feelings on this picture with an articulate "WEEEEEEE!"

Doug:

While I’ve been way too busy finishing up the majority of my grad school quarter, I’ve still found time to play a little bit of…erm…Forza Motorsport 3. And nothing else.

But it’s so good! I still love pretty much everything about it, even if I haven’t been able to play online with my friends at all. The rewind button is a godsend — it erases single-player frustration with the ease of control-z functionality. The selection of cars and tuning options are superb; I’ve made an old-school Volkswagen Rabbit into a fire-breathing, turbocharged four-wheel-drive monster that could eat a Ferrari for lunch and spit out its bones.

It’s been said that Microsoft and Turn 10 gets things right in the third iteration, and this particular game is a great example of that. It’s almost strange to think that all three Forza Motosport games have been released since Sony and Polyphony released Gran Turismo 4 on the PlayStation 2. It’s scary to think how much Forza has moved ahead certain aspects of console racing games.

Along with Forza, I’ve tried out a few of the Xbox Live improvements from this week’s update — namely the implementation of Facebook and Twitter. And that’s really the extent of my interaction; they’re there, they work just as advertised, but I feel like I’m kind of missing the point. It’s nice to have both services everywhere at all times, but until a real killer use for either blooms on the 360 they’re going to feel like tacked-on additions.

I don't think James Brown had this in mind when he wanted to take us to "the bridge."

Aaron:

Let’s get down to it. Left 4 Dead 2 and Dragon Age: Origins are two amazing games that deserve to be played on the PC only.

Now, I love consoles. This isn’t a fanboy thing. And I fully understand that not everyone has a modern computer capable of playing the latest releases — Boot Camp Macs included. So, let’s assume you’re a lucky gamer who has the following: a home console of the PS3 or Xbox 360 variety, and a gaming PC. Let’s also assume you enjoy co-op zombie shooting and in-depth fantasy RPGs. You’re excited about the aforementioned titles, but you’re hesitant to commit to a particular platform. Here’s the answer: Play those games on the PC, or you’re not getting your money’s worth.

That may be a blatantly ignorant statement to some, but these words come from a person who, before this month, more or less abandoned PC gaming over the past year (aside from Dawn of War II and Left 4 Dead 1). PCs get the short end of the doomsday stick these days. People say the PC as a gaming device is dead, no one makes money off of the games anymore, and pirating is ruining developers left and right. Controversies aren’t helping the perception of PC gamers amongst the general gaming populace either. So that’s why I’m glad to see Electronic Arts promoting the platform with a definitive version Dragon Age, and Valve doing their thing by releasing such a quality computer title as L4D2.

Dragon Age works best on PC because of the following: the overall better performance (higher frame rate, less glitching, faster loading), a more sensible control/camera mechanic, and a BioWare community toolset that paves the way for future user mods. If Neverwinter Nights is an example to go by, expect years of free, quality content flowing from the collective mind of an invested fan base.

Now, Left 4 Dead 2 deserves to be experienced on the PC because it’s a Valve title first, console port second — plain and simple. The Steam service is consistent in its ability to match like minded players and bring friends together promptly. PC gamers are spoiled when it comes to online play. Thanks, dedicated servers.

I’d also wager the community on Steam is better than Xbox Live’s. Actually, it is better. Left 4 Dead 2 even has a section specifically for add-ons, and it’s exciting to think of the campaigns an active community will create using the sequel’s assets. The original’s user-made maps were generally great, so expect a longer lifespan if you pick up L4D2 on the PC.

Oh, and PC versions are cheaper than their console counterparts. That’s a plus.

Via Rock-Paper-Shotgun: Why game companies don't take boycotters seriously…

Core gamers have taken up a new pastime as of late: Whining. Early and often.

Starcraft II won’t allow LAN play? Lord almighty! Modern Warfare 2 on PC moves away from dedicated servers and costs $10 more as well? Goodness gracious! Left 4 Dead 2 is coming out sooner than Valve fans want it to? Heavens no! Forza Motorsport 3 has content locked away behind a VIP-only velvet curtain? Oh, the humanity!

These complaints are rather justified. Game publishers and developers are making moves motivated by the bottom line, and as a result they begin to strip content and features away from gamers grown accustomed to these luxuries. Getting consumers to pay more for less is smart business, but bad for public relations. The complaints are fully warranted.

But the problem I see is that it is nothing but complaints as of right now.

The nerd rage is limited to online petitions and napalming messageboards, but nothing more. The Starcraft fans who complained loudly when it was announced (rather murkily) that all multiplayer is going to be routed through Battle.net are still likely going to be the people standing in line or pre-ordering online and playing the game at launch. Exhibit A? See the image at the top of this article (sourced via Rock, Paper, Shotgun) showing many members of a “BOYCOTT MODERN WARFARE 2″ Steam group…playing Modern Warfare 2. The indignation spilt out on all corners of the Internet now will likely be forgotten — or, perhaps, just ignored — in favor of actually playing the damn game at release.

Left 4 Dead fans display their opinion of Valve coming out with an improved sequel of their chosen game.

This is terrible because that is not how to get through to a business. If you have a problem with the moves these game publishers are making, sack up and take a stand — and vote with your wallet.

“B-b-b-b-b-b-but I’ve been looking forward to—“ Stop. It is achingly hypocritical to take such a stance and then cave once the retail copy of the game is waved in front of your face. Gamers — especially the core audience — have an insanely weak will in that regard.

What message does it send to Blizzard regarding LAN play in Starcraft II if they see record Day 1 sales numbers? Does it harm Infinity Ward and Activision to see an uproar on NeoGAF and Kotaku a month ahead of MW2’s release, but then break sales records once the game is out? If these companies succeed in light of feature-stripping, what does it say about gamers?

That we will buy anything, anyway. This is not a good thing. If you want to effect real change, you cannot cave in.

Fight the power.

If you are perfectly fine with what these companies do, shine on, you crazy diamond. I do not blame you; my desire for Forza 3 exceeded my own personal thoughts about changes to multiplayer and, specifically, the VIP program. There is a real danger that Turn 10 will start splitting the fanbase by releasing essential content to only a portion of its fans. Regarding multiplayer, Turn 10 took away the ability to create custom public lobbies, changing Forza 3 to a solely Halo-style hopper system — if you want to do a custom race, you have to find friends yourself. However, despite these changes, I like Turn 10’s games and quite like being inside that walled garden in Forza (it’s already netted me a few free cars in the game), so I paid the extra price.

I know people who will legitimately boycott Starcraft II — because they value LAN play and think Blizzard is overly greedy right now. I respect that. But that list of people “boycotting” Modern Warfare 2 and showing up on Steam as actually playing it? They are not helping — they are hurting the cause.

I don’t think anybody outside of Activision likes that company’s profit-centric business strategy right now, but the only way to affect it is to hurt their bottom line. Whining online (even this article!) is not going to change anything unless it is backed up by a firm stance.